Post by Mac Awol on Mar 23, 2011 9:43:32 GMT -5
Helena 'Toxic' Goldberg was 17, angry, and bruised.
She had just been convinced by her PRIMUS counsellor to join up the fight to protect Freedom, Democracy, and the American way.
And this was her first mission. Well, the mission was supervised by a PRIMUS agent, that could step in at any moment and save her, should the situation arise.
Toxic Helena had of course been confident, and what could a skinny-looking nerd in combat fatigue, with an assault rifle, bulletproof vest, and kevlar helmet do that she couldn't do. The guy spend more time looking at his H.U.D, than checking out the surroundings.
It had gone badly.
It was some kind of illegal drugs lab in some abandoned warehouse. Run by a gang of Haitians or Jamaicans, or what ever.
She had crashed through a skylight window, and using a little extra time, so it looked more dramatic floated down.
Unfortunately this had given the dozen of men in the warehouse time to arm themselves.
And before she even touched the ground the first bullets were flying around her head, and as she landed some large guy stepped on her tail and whacked her on the head with a large rusty piece of pipe.
She had spend the rest of the fight trying to avoid getting hit by the pipe, but he kept her tail pinned, so her had gotten some very painful hits in, until the nerd quietly took him down with a head shot as he had done with all the rest of guys.
And worst of all the nerd hadn't even bragged about it, he had just called PRIMUS for location clean-up.
As she was getting patched up the medic her PRIMUS counsellor had called a video conference, and in no uncertain terms told her she would still be under supervision.
So now she was skulking around some of the more suspect neighbourhoods looking for something to do.
She found it. A neon sign, that once had said, 'Lock-up', but now said, 'Loc – o', marked the place. A den, even the regulars were nervous about going it to.
Ignoring the fact that she had only throw a jacket on, but was still wearing her somewhat skimpy superhero outfit she enter the bar.
She had wanted to wear a short skirt as part of her uniform, but the PRIMUS PR-consultant had told her it send out the wrong signals.
She had asked him why.
His answer had made her blush with embarrassment over all the time she had worn a short skirt to school.
The bar was smoky, and she made a small cough. She didn't think it had been loud enough to hear of the music. Music, that was out of style, but not enough to be retro.
But many of the bar patrons looked at her curiously. She was actually a little surprised about how many of them that quickly found their drinks to be more interesting.
She tried to look her coolest as she walked up to the bar.
It took a few moments, before the bartender even bothered to address her.
“Yeah?”
“Eh.. a beer?” She knew she was under-aged, but she was there, and she felt like she needed some kind of comfort, so tried.
“Tap or Import?”
Playing it cool, she replied, “Tap.”, looking around at the other guests, “Large.”
The bartender turned to the tap and poured her a large regular beer, and placed in front of her.
As he mentioned a amount of cash to her, she realised she didn't have any money on her.
“Eh.. I don't have any.”
The bartender looked at her for a long time, then said, “You are one of those superheroes.”
She nodded a little meekly.
“You get credit on this one then, but that's it.”
Giving him a little smile as thanks, Helena tasted the beer. It wasn't too bad, and she sort of relaxed.
As she was halfway through the glass, she fell into a conversation with the guy next to her. It turned out he was a former VIPER henchman. Early retired because of a bum leg.
And he bought her another large regular.
Then this black guy, with a sort of pasty white tint to his skin moved over to them and started talking to Toxic Helena. He claimed to be a former zombie. She didn't really believe him, but the other bar guest said it was true.
Helena didn't even realise it until the 4th large had gone, that she was drunk.
And that was when the trouble started.
A very drunk guy wanted to post for a photo with her and she agreed.
The guy handed his camera phone to one of his buddies, then went over and put his arm around Helena.
That she didn't like, but hey, she would let him for just that photo.
“So what's a nice pizza place doing in a tail like this”, the drunk guy asked, as he lost his balance, stepped back right onto Toxic Helena's broken and bruised tail.
“AAAUW”, Helena yelped, turned and pushed him away from her. The drunk guy landed on the floor and knocked his head on a table.
“Hey, what are you doing”, the VIPER guy asked alarmed.
“He stepped on my tail”, Helena whined, turned, looked down, bended a little forward, gently lifted up her tail, and raised her head.
Now had there been space around her, it wouldn't have been a problem, but in this place she was like a babe in the wood surrounded by wolves.
The Zombie guy had moved to help his fallen drinking buddy, as Toxic Helena's horns skewed him in the butt.
“Holy Mother of Mary”, came his yell.
“What?”, Helena asked trying to lift her head.
“Stop. Don't do that.”, the VIPER guy said.
“What?”, Helena asked again, still tying to raise her head.
“Please for the love of everything holy make her stop”, the Zombie guy cried out.
Several hands moved to push Helena's head down. Almost making her fall over.
As the hands finally let her go, and raised her head.
“Why you do that for?”, she asked.
Several eyes looked at her, the Zombie Guy's the most hurt, as he rubbed his butt.
“It still hurts like hell.”
Toxic Helena realised what she had done, “Oh. I am so sorry. Didn't mean to. Here let me just ...”
She fumbled around in the pockets of jacket.
Triumphantly she raised a 'Hello Mew' Plaster, slipped, banged her head down in the bar, and got stuck in the desk with her horns.
They were good and well stuck, and she grinned goofily, “I think I am stuck now. Help please?”
The bar patrons started to laugh, even Zombie Guy, for which the wound in the butt was really just an inconvenience, that could be fixed with a few pounds of human flesh.
Helping Helena getting unstuck, the bartender could see a much worse accident happen in the very near future, if Toxic Helena was around, so he called a cab for her.
Next day, with hangovers and generally feeling like the cat had done its business on every one of here sense, Toxic Helena was called into her PRIMUS counsellor's office.
“What the hell is this?”, he almost shouted as the first thing when she entered the room.
“Eh.. What?”
He flipped the laptop on his table around, so she could see it.
It was a MYtube clip of her knock over the drunk, skewing the Zombie Guy, and getting stuck to the table.
And it already had 200000+ views.
Moaning Toxic Helena said, “Oh. Shi...”
Thank you for reading another Toxic Helena Adventure, if you should have any comments or just suggest, please, they are more than welcome.
She had just been convinced by her PRIMUS counsellor to join up the fight to protect Freedom, Democracy, and the American way.
And this was her first mission. Well, the mission was supervised by a PRIMUS agent, that could step in at any moment and save her, should the situation arise.
Toxic Helena had of course been confident, and what could a skinny-looking nerd in combat fatigue, with an assault rifle, bulletproof vest, and kevlar helmet do that she couldn't do. The guy spend more time looking at his H.U.D, than checking out the surroundings.
It had gone badly.
It was some kind of illegal drugs lab in some abandoned warehouse. Run by a gang of Haitians or Jamaicans, or what ever.
She had crashed through a skylight window, and using a little extra time, so it looked more dramatic floated down.
Unfortunately this had given the dozen of men in the warehouse time to arm themselves.
And before she even touched the ground the first bullets were flying around her head, and as she landed some large guy stepped on her tail and whacked her on the head with a large rusty piece of pipe.
She had spend the rest of the fight trying to avoid getting hit by the pipe, but he kept her tail pinned, so her had gotten some very painful hits in, until the nerd quietly took him down with a head shot as he had done with all the rest of guys.
And worst of all the nerd hadn't even bragged about it, he had just called PRIMUS for location clean-up.
As she was getting patched up the medic her PRIMUS counsellor had called a video conference, and in no uncertain terms told her she would still be under supervision.
So now she was skulking around some of the more suspect neighbourhoods looking for something to do.
She found it. A neon sign, that once had said, 'Lock-up', but now said, 'Loc – o', marked the place. A den, even the regulars were nervous about going it to.
Ignoring the fact that she had only throw a jacket on, but was still wearing her somewhat skimpy superhero outfit she enter the bar.
She had wanted to wear a short skirt as part of her uniform, but the PRIMUS PR-consultant had told her it send out the wrong signals.
She had asked him why.
His answer had made her blush with embarrassment over all the time she had worn a short skirt to school.
The bar was smoky, and she made a small cough. She didn't think it had been loud enough to hear of the music. Music, that was out of style, but not enough to be retro.
But many of the bar patrons looked at her curiously. She was actually a little surprised about how many of them that quickly found their drinks to be more interesting.
She tried to look her coolest as she walked up to the bar.
It took a few moments, before the bartender even bothered to address her.
“Yeah?”
“Eh.. a beer?” She knew she was under-aged, but she was there, and she felt like she needed some kind of comfort, so tried.
“Tap or Import?”
Playing it cool, she replied, “Tap.”, looking around at the other guests, “Large.”
The bartender turned to the tap and poured her a large regular beer, and placed in front of her.
As he mentioned a amount of cash to her, she realised she didn't have any money on her.
“Eh.. I don't have any.”
The bartender looked at her for a long time, then said, “You are one of those superheroes.”
She nodded a little meekly.
“You get credit on this one then, but that's it.”
Giving him a little smile as thanks, Helena tasted the beer. It wasn't too bad, and she sort of relaxed.
As she was halfway through the glass, she fell into a conversation with the guy next to her. It turned out he was a former VIPER henchman. Early retired because of a bum leg.
And he bought her another large regular.
Then this black guy, with a sort of pasty white tint to his skin moved over to them and started talking to Toxic Helena. He claimed to be a former zombie. She didn't really believe him, but the other bar guest said it was true.
Helena didn't even realise it until the 4th large had gone, that she was drunk.
And that was when the trouble started.
A very drunk guy wanted to post for a photo with her and she agreed.
The guy handed his camera phone to one of his buddies, then went over and put his arm around Helena.
That she didn't like, but hey, she would let him for just that photo.
“So what's a nice pizza place doing in a tail like this”, the drunk guy asked, as he lost his balance, stepped back right onto Toxic Helena's broken and bruised tail.
“AAAUW”, Helena yelped, turned and pushed him away from her. The drunk guy landed on the floor and knocked his head on a table.
“Hey, what are you doing”, the VIPER guy asked alarmed.
“He stepped on my tail”, Helena whined, turned, looked down, bended a little forward, gently lifted up her tail, and raised her head.
Now had there been space around her, it wouldn't have been a problem, but in this place she was like a babe in the wood surrounded by wolves.
The Zombie guy had moved to help his fallen drinking buddy, as Toxic Helena's horns skewed him in the butt.
“Holy Mother of Mary”, came his yell.
“What?”, Helena asked trying to lift her head.
“Stop. Don't do that.”, the VIPER guy said.
“What?”, Helena asked again, still tying to raise her head.
“Please for the love of everything holy make her stop”, the Zombie guy cried out.
Several hands moved to push Helena's head down. Almost making her fall over.
As the hands finally let her go, and raised her head.
“Why you do that for?”, she asked.
Several eyes looked at her, the Zombie Guy's the most hurt, as he rubbed his butt.
“It still hurts like hell.”
Toxic Helena realised what she had done, “Oh. I am so sorry. Didn't mean to. Here let me just ...”
She fumbled around in the pockets of jacket.
Triumphantly she raised a 'Hello Mew' Plaster, slipped, banged her head down in the bar, and got stuck in the desk with her horns.
They were good and well stuck, and she grinned goofily, “I think I am stuck now. Help please?”
The bar patrons started to laugh, even Zombie Guy, for which the wound in the butt was really just an inconvenience, that could be fixed with a few pounds of human flesh.
Helping Helena getting unstuck, the bartender could see a much worse accident happen in the very near future, if Toxic Helena was around, so he called a cab for her.
Next day, with hangovers and generally feeling like the cat had done its business on every one of here sense, Toxic Helena was called into her PRIMUS counsellor's office.
“What the hell is this?”, he almost shouted as the first thing when she entered the room.
“Eh.. What?”
He flipped the laptop on his table around, so she could see it.
It was a MYtube clip of her knock over the drunk, skewing the Zombie Guy, and getting stuck to the table.
And it already had 200000+ views.
Moaning Toxic Helena said, “Oh. Shi...”
Thank you for reading another Toxic Helena Adventure, if you should have any comments or just suggest, please, they are more than welcome.